Nicola turns the key for the umpteenth time. The car coughs, but doesn't start. In the cabin you can hear only the monotonous noise of the wipers that go back and forth and the rain that beats on the windshield and on the roof.
He snorts.
What a drag.
He reaches into the passenger seat and grabs his cell phone to call for breakdown assistance. The display lights up and Nicola sees that there isn't even a notch. No field.
Oh, perfect.
He throws his cell phone on the seat and turns to look out the window. It's not like there's much to see, as it's dark and pouring rain.
It is located on an anonymous provincial road in the middle of the countryside. The state road was cut off and he was forced to divert onto this road he doesn't know. On the way, he met very few cars. Dark fields can be seen from both sides of the roadway. Of houses, on the other hand, not even to talk about it.
What a fucking situation. It's too far to even go back to Elena's house. Thinking of her reminds him that, perhaps, he deserved a little bit to find himself thrown into the middle of the storm. He's been lying to his wife for months to be with Elena. And he's only been married for two years. This time too he said that he was going to Bologna for work and instead he joined Elena at her country house to spend the weekend.
Indeed, Bologna is an excuse that always works. Each time Nicola warns her that he will arrive late and each time her wife waits for him awake reading a book in bed.
Through the windshield, Nicola looks at a road sign illuminated by the car's headlights. He is corroded by rust. On the pole, someone has attached a bunch of withered flowers. The skeleton of a daisy, riddled with rain, breaks off and falls to the ground.
True, he's a terrible husband, in fact he's a real asshole, but at least it could stop the fucking rain.
He snorts again. Shit. She has no desire to spend the night in the car. Among other things, according to what you have read in the newspaper, it is precisely in those parts that a black panther has been sighted. Yet another panther. Periodically, articles appear in the newspapers about wild animals escaped from circuses, who go for a walk in the countryside woods. Nicola always thought they were urban legends, but at that moment he wouldn't bet on it. Who knows, maybe he should sleep in the car and wait for tomorrow to find a phone.
Two white lights appear in the rear view mirror. That's better. He turns on the four parking lights and gets out of the car to wait for the other car that arrives from the end of the road. He lifts his jacket over his head to keep out the rain. The taillights of his car paint a curbstone on the side of the road red.
Watch the other car approach. His high beams are on and he can't figure out the size or model. Nicola begins to signal with his arm. The car slows down and stops next to him.
A hearse.
The car is a hearse. A dark blue Mercedes station wagon with a cross on the front of the roof. Nicola is tempted to touch his attributes. The tinted window on the passenger side rolls down.
A man with thick black hair and beard stares silently ahead.
"Nicholas?" says a voice beyond the bearded man. "You are Nicola Landolfi, aren't you?"
«Yes... it's me» says Nicola confused.
The driver leans past the bearded man. He has sunken cheeks and big blue eyes. He smiles at Nicola.
“I thought I recognized you. I'm Giulio Fiorentini. Do you remember?"
The bearded man continues to stare straight ahead without opening his mouth.
«Ah, hello, Giulio» says Nicola. "How are you?"
Nicola remembers Giulio Fiorentini. They were classmates in high school. Giulio was part of the group of troublemakers who did badly in school and who were liked by the girls. Nicola had never met him outside the classroom. And then when Giulio, in the fourth year of high school, was expelled for having set fire to the hotel room during a field trip, Nicola had definitively lost sight of him.
"Cazzarola, how many years has it been?" says Julius. "Twelve? Thirteen?"
«Yes, more or less» says Nicola.
“And we meet again at night on this road, fuck the wolves. That's weird cool, you bitch bitch."
"Already."
Nicola is soaked. His wet shirt stuck to his back. And the water flows into his underpants. He doesn't feel comfortable with him at all.
"So, you old prick, what about you?" Giulio asks cheerfully.
«Listen, Giulio» says Nicola, «my car has broken down and my cell phone won't work here. Could you give me a ride to a bar or restaurant where I can make a phone call?”
Giulio looks at the bearded man. "We can?"
"They said you're the one making the decisions," the bearded man says without turning around.
“They said, who?” Nicola wonders.
Julius nods. “Right,” he says. “Uhmm,” he says then, rubbing his chin with one hand. Nicola wipes the water from his eyes. It's like being dressed in the shower. What did he ever ask that he has to think about it? Jesus, he just needs a little ride, not a loan of fifty thousand euros.
Finally Giulio makes up his mind. "Okay," he says. "After all, there shouldn't be any problems. Come on, come on."
Nicola thanks, opens the rear door and gets in. In the chest is a closed coffin made of solid wood.
Giulio says, "Tell us if it opens suddenly, huh?" Then he bursts out laughing.
Nicola smiles uncertainly. "I didn't know funeral homes worked at night."
«Yes, well, sometimes we have to work overtime» says Giulio.
Giulio engages first gear and the hearse sets off again. Nicola mechanically fastens his belt.
In front of them, only rain and darkness can be seen.
«So, Nick» says Giulio. «He Tells a little. What are you doing?"
"Nothing special. I'm a sporting goods salesman.”
“Oh. And what were you doing around here?”
“I went to see a friend,” he lies. She has no intention of telling Giulio the facts about her.
Julius nods. "I understand."
Nicola looks at the bearded man. He sits motionless and silent, with an alienated gaze. It's a little creepy. "No, stop shitting" he says to himself immediately afterwards in a burst of pride.
"You are married?" Giulio asks him again.
"Huh? Yes."
“Well, I'm very pleased. I mean, I remember you didn't bring up much pussy in high school."
«Well, but I made up for it at university» says Nicola embarrassed.
"Really? There really is hope for everyone, then.” Julius chuckles.
Nicola stares at the disheveled nape of his old companion. That's why they've never been friends with that asshole. And then what did Giulio do in his life? Drive a hearse geek, that's what. Pointing it out to him right now, though, wouldn't be a great idea, even if he deserves it, all right. That undertaker asshole.
"And you? You are married?" Nicola asks instead to change the subject.
“I was for a while, but it didn't last. I like pussy too much.” She turns to the friend. “Right, Luger?”
Nicola's gaze moves to the back of the bearded man's neck. Wasn't the Luger the pistol used by the Nazis in WWII?
"You're capable of screwing even corpses," Luger says, still looking straight ahead.
Julius laughs. “Yes, but only those who don't have worms. I'm not a beast. Speaking of dead… Luger, tell Nicola the joke you told me. It really pisses.”
Luger turns back to Nicola. The acid green dashboard lights illuminate his face; he looks like a zombie.
"What does a skull with a cock in its mouth do?" says Luger.
Nicole shakes her head.
“Funeral homes,” concludes Luger.
Nicola smiles out of politeness, but in reality he knew her. She's a joke they tell in elementary school, she's covered in feet of mold.
"Didn't you like it?" Julius asks him. “I almost shit myself laughing.”
Luger stares at Nicola with wide eyes. Nicola looks away. Now why the fuck does she have to stare at him like that?
"No, I liked it," she says quickly.
“But you already knew her,” Luger says.
“Yes… Actually, yes.”
"Then why didn't you say it right away, you asshole son of a bitch?"
Nicola suddenly discovers that her throat is dry and is unable to answer. He just blinks at Luger. Luger rotates on the seat and returns to its original position. "If there's one thing that pisses me off, it's telling jokes to people who already know them."
"In fact, these are things you don't do," says Giulio sympathetically.
Nicola regrets asking for a ride. Giulio has never been nice to him and his friend Luger… well, he wouldn't look bad in a straitjacket.
He puts his hand in his jacket pocket to look for his cell phone and see if it picks up again, so he can finally call roadside assistance and disengage from those two. There is no cell phone. She forgot it in the car. She calls herself an asshole. She looks out the window. In the midst of darkness and rain, only woods and, higher up, hills with vineyards can be perceived. But when do the houses start?
Giulio certainly has a cell phone. Maybe he could call with him, if there's coverage in the area. He is about to ask her when, after a curve, he sees a carabinieri patrol stationed on the side of the road. A checkpoint. Perfect. He can get out and ask the carabinieri to call him a tow truck. A carabiniere raises his paddle and signals to pull over.
«I'm going down here» says Nicola. "You don't need to worry about me anymore."
Giulio puts the arrow on, slows down and stops behind the Carabinieri Jeep Defender.
Nicola unbuckles his seat belt, ready to get out, when he sees Luger pull out a pistol and put it between his legs.
Nicola's breath is taken away. "But what are you doing?"
The soldier with the paddle approaches Giulio's window. Giulio lowers it, Luger extends his arm and fires. Nicola jumps on the seat at the sound of the detonation, in the passenger compartment the shot has the power of thunder.
The carabiniere's face explodes. Blood and chunks of flesh splatter on the dashboard and rear window.
The second carabiniere aims the machine gun at the hearse, Luger opens the door and shoots. The carabiniere, centered on the bulletproof vest, backs away, crashing into the side of the jeep. Luger's second shot, however, bursts his carotid artery. The outlet of blood spurts on the machine gun. The carabiniere twitches his finger on the trigger, a short burst is lost in the black sky and his body collapses against the wheel of the jeep.
"Oh God," says Nicola. "Hate."
"Be good," Giulio tells him.
Luger approaches the jeep and shoots the carabiniere in the head. Then he gets back in the car. He has long wet hair plastered to his forehead.
"Go," he says to Giulio. Julius leaves again. Luger turns to Nicola pointing the gun at him. "Do not move."
Nicola starts shaking.
Giulio glances at him in the rearview mirror. “Listen, Nick. I am sorry. But there's a lot of drugs in that coffin. It couldn't have been done otherwise, you understand?"
Nicola's mind is paralyzed, worse than a crashed computer. His sounds and voices seem to reverberate as if inside a cave.
"What do we do now?" Giulio asks Luger.
«Guess» says the other, still with the gun aimed at Nicola.
Julius sighs. “Shit, Luger. We went to school together."
“You should have thought of that before loading it.”
Julius shakes his head. "What a shitty night."
They go on for another couple of kilometers, then Luger says, "This is fine."
Giulio stops in a dirt clearing, switches off the engine and gets out of the car. Nicholas looks out. On the right, beyond the guardrail, a sloping meadow continues for about ten meters up to a wood.
Luger gets out of the car and opens the door for him. “Get off,” he says.
"Where do we go?" Her voice is thin and tremulous.
"Get off."
"No Please."
Luger grabs his hair and pulls him out. Nicola shivers when the cold water from the rain lashes his body.
Luger pushes him towards the lawn.
Nicola climbs over the guardrail and starts walking in the meadow followed by Luger and Giulio. But terror makes his legs give out almost immediately and he stumbles on the wet grass. Giulio helps him to stand up.
"Come on, come on," she says, as if to encourage him.
Then they go into the woods. "It's over" Nicola thinks. “Now they kill me. They will bury me somewhere and my wife will never find me again.” The image of her staying up on purpose to say good night makes him want to cry.
“Stop,” Luger says. Nicola turns to them. They are two indistinct shadows. Luger turns his head towards Giulio. "It's all yours."
"As?" says Giulio "I thought you did it."
"The responsibility is yours."
"I just wanted to do him a favor."
Luger stares at him calmly. "Who knows, maybe you're doing it to him."
Giulio takes a long sigh, then puts a hand behind his back and takes a gun. “On your knees, Nick.”
«Please, Giulio» says Nicola. “I won't say anything. I have not seen anything. I swear to God."
“I'm really sorry. But it's not possible» Giulio pauses. "You won't feel any pain anyway."
Giulio extends his arm and aims the pistol at Nicola's forehead.
Luger places a hand on Giulio's gun. "Stop," he says softly.
"What's up?" Giulio says to him.
"Voices. To our right."
"Thing?"
«Shhh» says Luger and grabs Nicola. He closes his mouth with his hand, pulls him by the neck, drags him to the ground. Then Nicola feels the hard barrel of the gun press against his temple.
Luger nods to Giulio. This turns in the direction indicated by Luger and approaches an embankment. He climbs up and sticks his head out to look.
A shot.
Julius's head disappears in a swarm of gray matter, flesh and blood.
«Christ» hears Nicola da Luger say.
Julius's body leans to one side and rolls to the base of the embankment.
Luger lets go of him and runs away in the opposite direction.
Nicola turns towards the top of the embankment. A flash radiates the silhouette of a man wearing a waterproof cape and a rifle.
The man goes down the embankment and stops to look at Giulio's body.
He puts his hands in his hair and starts whimpering. “Oh, no, shit. No."
Nicola observes him motionless, his hands sunk into the wet earth.
"Did you take it?" says another male voice from across the embankment.
Two other men with rifles reach the first one who despairs. «I saw it move… I thought it was the panther…»
"Jesus Christ, what a brothel," says one of the other hunters.
The third man looks around and notices Nicola.
It has finally stopped raining.
Nicola, wrapped in a blanket that smells of dog, is sitting in the station wagon of one of the hunters, stopped on the edge of the provincial road. The three hunters are talking standing outside the car.
Nicola explained what happened and the guy who killed Giulio seems less upset now. Everyone is waiting for the carabinieri who should arrive within twenty minutes.
Nicola takes a look at the clock. It's nearly three o'clock.
His wife will surely be looking for him. He has to call her, he doesn't want to make her anxious. He gets out of the car and approaches the hunters.
“I'd need my cell phone to call home,” she says.
The car owner hands it to him. "Certain."
Nicola goes away and dials the home number. He presses the call button, puts the phone to his ear.
And he sees it.
The Panther.
Beyond the road, the animal crosses the meadow and then slips into the wood, its black, shiny, sinuous coat becoming one with the darkness under the trees.
Nicola turns to the hunters to warn them. In fact, the three have not noticed her, they are continuing to chat.
Nicola observes them for a few moments, reflecting.
Then he turns back towards the woods, and remains in silence listening to the dial tone.
* * *
Davide Lisino was born in Turin in 1977. Graduated in Law, he works as a screenwriter for TV series, first for Endemol and then for Sky, with the animated series Adrian, conceived by Adriano Celentano with drawings by Milo Manara and music by Nicola Piovani. In 2008 he published the noir-comic novel Italian Cowboys (Fandango), a parody of Philip Marlowe-esque private eye stories; in 2011 it comes out Heroes exhausted for goWare. He is the author of short stories and numerous subjects and cinematographic screenplays. Passionate about martial arts, black belt in karate, he lives between Rome and Turin.
