“In the toolbox of today's young people I would put the computer, but also books. I would give them scissors to cut dry branches and to cut the umbilical cord. And a hoe. Because the place where we have to live is the earth and the world I imagine for them is a sustainable world". So the psychoanalyst Massimo Ammaniti, author of the book "The teenage family"; guest today in Bologna of the Opificio, citadel of knowledge and culture, where he will converse with Marilisa Martelli, President of the Child Mental Health Association and with Antonio Danieli, director of the Golinelli Foundation.
FIRSTonline – Professor, reading your book, one gets the impression that today's family is made up of three or four teenagers, rather than parents and children. What is going on?
Ammaniti – After the 80s and 90s the culture of narcissism grew. The scenario has changed and many rules, responsibilities, renunciations, faults have disappeared. The new terms of existence are happiness, self-realization, affirmation of one's point of view. From a situation of social and collective responsibility, the pendulum has swung towards individual needs. Parents today want to fulfill themselves more than pass on responsibilities to their children. They need to feel young, to escape the idea of aging and death. It can be said that parents move in a parallel direction to their children, so everyone in the family stays young. Everyone has a cell phone, everyone has facebook. The relationship with the son no longer wants to be conflictual, but complicit.
FIRSTonline – Is this scenario also affecting school? Once upon a time, if the teacher scolded you, your mother grounded you. Is it still like this today?
Ammaniti – No, it's not like that anymore, on the contrary. If their children get bad grades, parents often blame the teachers. The result is that the teachers no longer understand the kids, who always find refuge with mom and dad.
FIRSTonline – L'Opificio, where today he will talk about these topics, is a place dedicated above all to young people, a context where teenagers can experiment with their entrepreneurial ideas and learn to accept even mistakes and failures. Is this a model that works?
Ammaniti – Definitely yes, it is a very important approach. Today's young people mostly live in an artificial context, while they have
need to face reality. Work is an extraordinarily useful experience, because it empowers and engages them. Among other things, when faced with important events, they are available and capable. Think of the role played in the Genoa disaster. While in L'Aquila a project to involve them was blocked, giving space to clowns in schools, precisely what is not needed.
FIRSTonline – Opus 2065 is the latest project of the Golinelli Foundation. The goal is to provide kids with an adequate toolbox for a world we can't even imagine. What would you put in this box?
Ammaniti – The computer, the books, the scissors, a hoe. Because the earth must be worked, we cannot mistreat it, we must take care of it. Every experience in the field is good for the kids: when we involve them in cleaning the parks they participate with enthusiasm and understand the value of what they are doing.
FIRSTonline – How do you imagine the world in 50 years, when today's teenagers will be old?
Ammaniti – I can't imagine it. I just hope these kids will be responsible adults and the teenage family will be outdated.
FIRSTonline – In a recent article Susanna Tamaro writes: “I have a well-founded suspicion that this triumph of individual freedom rather than lead us to the coveted Parnassus of man without yokes, you risk taking us directly to the primate that slumbers within us. Tenderly sweet primates but also capable of experiencing the joy and ferocity of murder for its own sake”.
Is a world that shuns frustrations a world that no longer matures? Ammaniti – Of course, as Freud argues, frustration, renunciation, conflict, trauma: they are all steps that help to grow.
